Dads & Partners

Becoming a new parent is exciting, but it can also be quite daunting. The focus is naturally on the ‘mum to be' and the changes she is undergoing, however both parents have a lot to deal with and pregnancy can stir up a mixture of thoughts and emotions.

Your role as an expectant parent is hugely important – whether you are in a relationship with the mum-to-be or not, your support can impact on how things turn out for both mum and baby.

Before the Baby is Born

Talk, read, and sing to your baby-to-be. Babies can hear during the second trimester of pregnancy, and recognise voices in the third trimester—including yours!
Attend appointments as much as you can. These appointments can help you both feel connected with the baby. The midwife will discuss options for birth, the wellbeing of mum and baby and you will hear the baby’s heartbeat.
Support healthy habits. Your encouragement helps your partner eat the right foods and avoid smoking and drinking during pregnancy. For example, research shows that your support makes it easier for the mum to begin and continue breastfeeding.
Be there for labour and the birth if possible. Both parents naturally worry about the labour and birth process. Studies report that being present at your baby’s birth has a positive impact on both yourself and on the relationship with your partner and baby, although some felt anxious witnessing labour pain. Discuss any fears or worries you have with your midwife. Read up on birth and labour and help your partner make choices around birth preferences. Practise massage and relaxation techniques together, before the big day. Do not underestimate the importance of your role. Mums report that having their partners in the birth room reduces their anxiety and pain. Find out more about supporting your partner during pregnancy, labour and birth by reading about pregnancy, birth and beyond for dads and partners.

After the baby is born

Skin to skin: it is important that the baby has uninterrupted skin to skin with your partner for the first hour of life. However, it is also recognised that both parents should be encouraged to have skin to skin time with their newborn.

Research has shown that skin to skin at birth with both parents is important. This is your opportunity to begin a bond with your child. Research studies have shown that even 30 minutes of skin-to-skin increases dopamine and oxytocin and lowers testosterone, ensuring that you will have an automatic positive association from close contact with their baby.

Continue to talk, read, and sing. You’ve been talking, reading, and singing to your baby for months. Now enjoy seeing their responses for the first time!
Figure out how to share responsibility for the baby. New dads can do almost everything new mums can do - change nappies, give baths, share stories, and take your turn walking and soothing when the baby is crying. If your partner is breastfeeding, you can participate by bringing the baby to her, or burping them when they're done. Sharing these responsibilities right from the start gives you a chance to get to know your baby and builds a strong basis for your relationship with them.
Pay attention to your baby’s cues. Over time, babies develop their own ways of telling you want they need—through a particular cry, look, or movement. By spending time caring for and playing with your baby, you’ll start to decode their cues.
Lots of people will offer you new-dad advice, but the most important person to listen to once the baby arrives is your partner. Encourage her to tell you how she’s feeling and what she needs and she’ll likely do the same for you. You are both in this together!